>Your four basic food groups are: 1. Caffeine, 2. Fat, 3. Sugar, 4. Chocolate

>Your checkbook always balances

>Your dress clothes come from Sears

>Your father sat 2 inches in front of your family's first color TV with a magnifying lens to see how they made the colors, and you grew up thinking that was normal

>Your favorite actor is R2D2

>Your favorite character on Gilligan's Island was "The Professor"

>Your favorite James Bond character is "Q," the guy who makes the gadgets

>Your favorite place in San Francisco is the Exploratorium

>Your favorite television show is New Yankee Workshop

>Your girlfriend says the way you dress is no reflection on her

>Your idea of a "good read" is the Edmund Scientific catalog

>Your idea of good interpersonal communication means getting the decimal point in the right place

>Your ideal evening consists of fast-forwarding through the latest sci-fi movie looking for technical inaccuracies

>Your Internet bill is higher than your long distance charges

>Your IQ is a higher number than your weight

>Your kids refer to you as The Man Who Sleeps with Mommy

>Your laptop computer costs more than your car

>Your spouse sends you an email instead of calling you to dinner

>Your three-year-old son asks why the sky is blue and you try to explain atmospheric absorption theory

>Your wardrobe looks like you shop at Goodwill Industries

>Your wife hasn't the foggiest idea what you do at work

>Your wife thinks your taste in ties is bizarre

>Your wrist watch has more computing power than a 300Mhz Pentium

>Your wristwatch has more buttons than a telephone